speech draft

Imagine having 8.3 billion dollars in your name?! you can buy almost anything you want with that amount of money! but it’s not money i’m going to talk about today. I’m going to discuss the importance of not giving up on your dreams and goals. but tell you for fun the person who has .3 billion dollars in his names is Steve jobs.He is one person who never gave up and reached his goals. he could have give  up, but he didn’t know what the outcome would be unless he tried. so he tried and tried until he perfected the Apple company, which is now one of the world’s most valuable companies.

Steve Jobs perfected the Ipad, Ipod, Iphone(just to name a few), all by ignoring the negative comments people said about his wild dreams and goals. People thought what he wanted to accomplish was impossible, but he never gave up, and he now called ‘The father of digital revolution’, and ‘Master of innovation’.

Another man who never gave up on his dreams and ignored the obstacles is Thomas Edison. In particular we all know he created the electric light bulb; however, he also created the phonograph and motion picture camera. He too was thought to be crazy in wanting to create such modern devices. But again, he never gave up on his vision and now named the fourth most prolific inventor in history.

Both of these men have left a powerful mark on human history. They taught was not to give up on ourselves, let your imagination run free, and think of ways to make the world better pace. Because of that, they will be remembered forever. So i want to conclude with these.

Be a leader not a follower, and never give up on your dreams, and i will leave you with a quote from Edison- “Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is to try just one more time.”

3 comments:

Unknown said...

Jaden,
I like your whole consept of your speech but i also think that you should make a hook and catch the audience. you dont really have a srong hook so i think if you changed that you would be able to really hold the audience and keep their attention. I also liked how you used examples in your speech so that you can as a audience member realte to the topic.i think that overall you have a good speech and i really like the ending quote that you used it really summed up your speech!

sydneyt said...

Jaden,

First off, I think you picked a great topic. It is really important to never give up on your dreams and to follow them until u succeed. I suggest you put this into a Word document first, so that you can use the spell check. I noticed that you had a lot of little spelling mistakes.

When you quotes Edison, you said " and i will leave you with a quote from Edison- “Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is to try just one more time.” I think you should take out the "quote from Edison" and put "as Edison once said........". This is exactly the same as Ms Lees taught us to do.

Overall, Good job!

Unknown said...

Wow, that was an amazing speech. I really think the topic will relate to the audience. There were some places were you may want to look over again lik this line: but tell you for fun the person who has .3 billion dollars in his names is Steve jobs. It's a bit confusing the way you said it. Other than some other places where you were missing a word or two, it was great. I loved your hook about having 8.3 million dollars!

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